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Saturday, January 15, 2005 

we interrupt your life...

... with these (not so) important reminders.

dear consumer,

do you have assets too small? do you have non-existent mortgages to pay for?
help is on hand. we have a variety of products we think you will like (but do not really need. but hey, this is what advertisement is for, right?).

our services include:
* e-mail blocking. we spam your e-mail inbox with our useless information, bad spelling (we have to avoid those pesky filters!) and mega-huge graphic files, thus blocking you from receiving important e-mails from your family, friends and collegues. as a bonus, you'll receive this service free of charge!

* 24 hour web monitoring. if you are interested and do decide to drop by our friendly website, we provide yet another free service in the form of web monitoring. we will automatically install in your computer some programs to log your keystrokes, hijack your webpages to (not so) useful search sites and steal your passwords and important information for safekeeping. we'll also help ourselves to the money in your online bank account and jack your modem (if it's dial up) so as to allow you to make long distance calls to some stranger in a faraway place such as cook island. this service is also free of charge.

* selling unwanted stuff. we aggressively promote items that you do not find on the shelf of your family-friendly supermarts (usually to cater to physical pleasures). we insult you in our e-mail subject lines to tempt you to read our latest most exciting offers to enhance non-existent body parts. p/s: you do not have to be above 18 to buy from us. we do not give a damn.

do drop by our website to find out more about us!

your sincerely,
ceo of webannoyance pte. ltd.

as this is a computer generated letter, no signature is required.

aahhhh.. the joys of technology. ^^


on another note...

dear visitors,

comments are mainly what drives bloggers on. if you do stop by, and happen to like/hate what we're writing, please please please take a couple of seconds to tell us so. i'm not begging, i just find it discouraging that nobody seems to be visiting this blog. =(

anyhow, till the next post~

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