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Wednesday, December 29, 2004 

Why is Sly Fly? Coz you're an Idiot! He's not!

If you're a true-blue, die-hard, scream-your-lungs-out-till-you-hyperventilate fan who is insane (and that's a already an understatement) enough to chalk up a $5000 phone bill over Sly, and you have no capacity to listen let alone swallow any criticism towards your Prince Charming who will certainly never in your lifetime become your Prince, please do not read on.

If you're a normal being capable of logical thought and have the capability to rationalize and reason, and who is still baffled at Sly's surprising and totally undeserving position as the runner up of Singapore Idol, please read on.

Also, if you're an airhead and a Sly fan who fits the first category, and want to retaliate by defending Sly with inane comments, or to go ahead to cuss me with your your limited vocabulary, go ahead. Hit me with your best shot.

This week's 8 Days says:
Why is Sly Fly?
8days: He still points that skinny finger, winks and flashes that cheeky grin. And fans will howl in appreciation. One party is patronising the other. We don't know which.
I construe it as: He's a shameless camera whore, and makes up for his lack of talent by covering it up with "trademarks" that everyone is capable of doing. The fans screaming in delight over a talentless singer who isn't even good looking ( but can still pass off as cute to blind airheads) shows how much more shameless the fans are than Sly.

8days: He changes his hair colour more often than a Taiwanese boy band. He's bow-legged but braves the tight jeans. He drowns in a suit. Fans insist he has 'style'. We're not worthy.
I construe it as : It doesn't matter what you wear. Ugly means ugly. Michael Jackson in a Huge Boss suit will still look like the devil incarnate.

8days: He has the complexion of an eight-year-old. Puberty pressure and harsh conditions in National Service haven't affected him. amazing, but highly despicable. Yes, we're jealous.
Me: Guess I'm jealous too. But the disturbing fact is that he has a better complexion than at least half of his entire fanbase, most of which are of the Y-Chromosome crowd. The fact these Prince-charming fantasising, estrogen raging, shrill-voiced screamy girls actually still adore him is further proof that they are airheads. It'll be totally shameful for your Prince Charming to have better skin than you.

8days: He promises to be every fan's 'boyfriend'. And they believe him. It's not fair.
Me: Dude, I know a shameless jostle for more votes when I see one, man. To the fans: Aren't promises meant to be broken, yoz?

8days: He is neither spectacularly intelligent nor coherent. Despite the perpetually "lost" expression, his fans get him-- because he laughs nervously (like Beavis from Beavis and Butthead) at everything.
Me: His. Fans. Are. Dumb.

8days: He is perhaps the only one in Idol history to be wildly successful just after "smiling more". It takes 43 muscles to frown and only 17 to smile. blahblahblah. Why isn't he the face of Courtesy Campaign?
Me: Coz smiling is not = to courtesy, you brainless idiots. I can smile when you fall down the stairs. Courtesy, anybody?

At this point of time, I realize I should stop posting about these trivial, frivolous matters. Especially in the wake of the Tsunami that hit Sri Lanka so so so badly, and also other countries like Thailand and Indonesia. I just want to send out all my heartfelt condolences to anyone who lost any family members in the disaster. Sometimes you don't know why these stuff happen and I wonder all the time why these things happen. I ask myself, why does God want to create such nuisances to mankind? But God always has a reason, and His ways aren't man's ways. He works differently, and He has a reason for doing what He does. I'm sad for those lost in the accident, and I'm even more sad that I can't do anything for them. Life goes on for me, and everyone else. Including those affected by the accident. This all seems kinda cruel sometimes eh?

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